A short adventure here- I went to the pharmacy to buy some eye drops. It was a hot day. There was a girl working there, she seemed too young to have a job. As I entered the empty store she looked up, scowling. 

“You don’t look very pleased to see me,” I told her. 

Her scowl quickly reversed into a wide, pharmacist’s smile. I sent her off into the back to get me the Hyco-sans (sounds like a Japanese Tekken character, or a font). I stood two metres behind, in front of two chairs that were being used as a desk on which to rest the card reader. I scanned my card and wished her a glorious day. 

As I was driving back down the high street, I notice a Mazda MX5, silver with the roof off, and check the number plate. This is my nan, who lives with my sister who wanted the eye drops. She is driving directly in front of me. She turns left, and as she does, I undo my driving seat window, and take my opportunity, imagining that what I’ve got is not eye drops, but a block of C4. 

I didn’t make the throw, the eye drops came tumbling down onto the pavement and full of shame I had to pull over by the double yellow lines and get them. My nan pulled over as well, and I went over and gave her the eye drops. 

“Is everything okay James?”

“Yeah fine thanks, how are you?”

“Good thank you.”

She shouldn’t have been, she should have been blown to smithereens. Oh well, there is always, I mean never, a next time.